I agree with pretty much everything you've written. I also think that your arguments will do nothing to sway anyone in the 'bible is literally true' camp. I read through and had the mild pleasure of having my point of view reinforced, and a little rush from a savage sense of outrage at the stupidity of others.

I try to move from outrage to curiosity. I believe in diversity so how to connect and live with those weird Christians? It. Helps that I also believe that there is some value hidden in religions and myths, if you don't read them as literal truth.

Of course as soon as you start saying 'I have the secret key to decode ancient teachings' you skirt, or perhaps cross into some potentially weird delusional territory!