passive aggressive in my mind includes not honest - and how fucking 'enlightened' is that?

Some years a go an old Coaching colleague of mind was in business negotiations with another coach.

The other coach said "I'm not sure our values are aligned"

My friend replied "In our industry there is a tendency to blah blah blah abut values, when what you really mean is I don't like you."

In this anecdote that sentiment was mutual.